It's now a few days in to my 13th week! I can't believe we made it to the 2nd trimester! It honestly feel so surreal. There are days where I still can't believe there is a little human swimming around in my body. I'm sure once we know the gender and I can feel movement it will be more real.
This week has been awful. I've been really sick with nausea and headaches and pretty grumpy. I missed 3 days of work and felt like I sucked at life. I'm happy to report though that my kitchen and bathroom have stayed clean through it all. The threat of having to put your face in the toilet will do that to ya. *wink* Being sick physically hasn't helped my emotional state at all. I still cry over anything and everything. I've started having stronger and more frequent anxiety attacks. I don't want to tell my Dr. because medication is the last thing I need. I should probably buy a yoga video so I can breath and relax when I get too stressed or anxious. I seem to have separation anxiety now also. When I'm alone I start freaking out and get really lonely. I'm sure it's just hormone madness but it sure feels like the end of the world when I'm in that moment. I also have a lot of tightness and pain in my lower abdomen and back. I expected my back to hurt as I have a previous injury but I didn't think my belly would hurt so much until it got bigger.
I had my EAGeR appointment at the University of Utah Hospital and the nurse gave me more pictures from our first ultrasound at the LDS Hospital. I haven't gained any weight since my last appointment a month ago so that means I'm still down about 10lbs from my pre-pregnancy weight. I'm pretty happy about that. I needed to lose a little bit before, but hey, if baby wants to help me out I'll take it.
Life is pretty quiet for the most part. We're just waiting until the 1st of April to decide where we're going to live and see what opportunities present themselves. I've picked up some boxes to start packing the things we don't use on a daily basis. I have a feeling we'll be tossing a lot of stuff. I'm worried about Dare, I don't think she'll ajdust very well. My silly co dependant puppy... It looks like we won't have as many fish to move though because they all keep dying! Somehow they got a nasty fungus and it killed of a few cichlids and most of my tropicals. :( It must have been brought in with another fish becuase Steven takes care of those guys better than anything else we own. Well, besides the playstation. Ha!
Here is this week's picture. I think my bump is going down. In case you're wondering, yes, I basically live in that outfit when not at work. Excuse the awful hair and face, I was sick that day.
youre gorgeous ! I love you with no makeup and you look so young. HOOORAY for making the second trimester.. its so exciting. Eat what appeals to you, and dont be afraid to mention your anxiety to your doc. you dont have to be medicated, but you might benefit from a little therapy, you have been through the wringer, and its only natural that you should be anxious. yoga is good.
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Aww, Emily, thank you so much. You're so encouraging. I will mention it at my next appointment. I had a horribly vivid dream of a m/c last night and shooting cervix pains all night so I woke up terrified. Luckily it seems to all be in my head. There has to be a way to let all of that go. How are you doing? Are you doing clomid still?
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